The Ryan story

Okay, so, I’m telling you all of this because I’m still heartbroken…after 4 years. And I really just need to rant to somebody. Soooo….Let’s get to it!
flashback to second grade
Me and Ryan. Close friends but kinda distant cause we didn’t know each other that well. That changed rather fast when a friend of mine blurted out I liked him. (FOR THE RECORD I DON’T ANYMORE SO SHUSH!!!!!!) Anyways, we started to become really close friends. It was really nice and I spent more time with him and my best friend (Alex) at the time.
flashback to third grade
Start of the year…He didn’t really talk to me. But each day was another excuse to see him. 3 weeks in we were talking again and we added Tommy into our group of 3. I talked to Ryan and Tommy so much my teacher made me sit in the corner. I had a great time and when we went on a field trip to down town me and Ryan kinda got lost from the group. We were great friends and I could never see us ending. I still had a crush on him at the time. I even got invited to his, his brother, and his sister’s parties!
flashback to fourth grade
This year. This year is where one horrible person messed up my life. It was the year my friends were growing up without me and the year I went into the gifted programs. Ryan stopped hanging out with me, Tommy and Alex. He started to like this one girl. But that’s not who messed my life up. Mackenzie Cazier. I’m not afraid to post her full name because she fvcked up my life. And you know what? She took Alex. I only had Alex as Ryan pulled away from me. So I had no one. No one at all.
flashback to fifth grade
Same old same old. Except I became more comfortable with myself. I had confidence that there wasn’t a finger that could be pointed at me. Mackenzie still insisted to cause pain in my life.
flashback to sixth grade
Friendless, I went into middle school. And truly I was scared. But I joined girl scouts. I made a few friends and felt a bit safer. I met Asha. She became my best friend and I felt safe again.
flashback to seventh grade
I met Amber. I knew her friend Mackenzie (not the bitch so I’ll call her Mack) So me, Mack, and Amber became better friends. Asha and I became better friends and I made more and more. I met Quinn and James that year. Two people who really care. I started to get better and I was back at being comfortable. And I even met my favorite teacher!
Eighth grade
So now I’m in eighth grade. My emotions are stable. I have so many friends. Mack, Amber, Elizabeth, Maggie, Korina, Asha, Nicole, Mitzi, Raven, Liz, Shawn, Chris, Quinn, James, two Alexs (One is Alex), K.T., Samantha, my best friend: Jordyn, and my boyfriend Paul.
But the fact is, I’m still broken. I still need Ryan. So, I started to remember this all and I just couldn’t take it. Please…I just have no idea what to do. It’s one of the times you wonder if they’ve forgotten all about you.
-Noni